Change

Back in October I came to the realization that I was living in fear and it was holding me back.  Specifically in the area of our housing situation.

We bought our house at the peak of housing before the big crash.  We were some of the lucky one who didn’t end up over our head.  We have always been able to afford our mortgage and a bit more.  It’s comfortable.

I don’t like letting people into my finances.  I feel judgement.  I think this stems from my childhood and always feeling judged and like I made the wrong choices.  Before we move on….I don’t know that you could really said I ever made any bad choices – I had good friends, I made good grades, I completed my degree, I avoided debt (with the exception of calculated credit building debt), I married a decent guy (and that’s an EXTREME understatement), I work hard, you get the point…my one mistake might be that I haven’t ever taken any risks.

Anyway, I went to my husband one day and I told him, nothing is going to happen if we don’t DO something.  And so we began DOING something.  We started looking at houses.  We started talking to Realtors.  We got Pre-Approved!   In fact, right when I got let go, we were in the process for sending the final docs to the mortgage broker and were scheduling walk-throughs.  We put the house buying on hold until my job is figured out.

I’ve had two internal interviews.  Both for extremely different positions.  I haven’t been offered either, but the last interview was just a few hours ago.  If I was offered both I don’t know what I would do.  One area, I know a lot of the people I’d work with, but it would require office-time.  The other area, I know the content more and I’d still get to work from home, but it’s a sales position, which means a partial commissions-based pay and I don’t know what that really looks like/feels like, etc. Both would challenge me and both have lots of room for growth, which is great because I feel like I’m slightly maxed out of growth opportunities in my current position.

But there is a downside of staying at the company that is whisking away over 20 employees with no less than 7 years in their current role and replacing them with a few handfuls of folks who will be joining the company at the entry-level, with a very short timeframe for training.  Anyone that remains will “on-call” for any issues that may arise!

I started this talking about a new house.  I think God opened my heart to that change to prepare me for this job change.  We don’t change:

  • We’ve lived here for 9.5 years
  • I’ve been with my employer 13 years
  • Zach has been with his employer for 10 years
  • Zach has driven his car for 10 years
  • I’ve driven my car for 6 years
  • I’ve only ever had 1 bank account….18 years, same bank.

And now I’m living in limbo.  By summer, our lives will look different.  I WILL have a new job.  We HOPE to have a new house.  Isaac will be in full-time school.  Lynzie will be starting preschool.

We are growing.  Growth is uncomfortable, but it’s exciting, it’s freeing and we are ready to tackle this new time in our lives.

Almost a month….

I realized today that I haven’t written anything in almost a month. What a slow poke am I. I’d like to say I’ve been busy, but I can’t really think of anything that’s kept me really busy, so I guess I can’t say that.

I’m super excited about teaching. I wish school started tomorrow, or at least that I didn’t have to work anymore. How nice will it be to have the whole summer off next year and still get paid? I never thought about teaching in that way. It was never a ‘benefit’ in my mind like it is in many. But now that I’ve spent several summers working, and spending this summer trying to plan, work and have a bit of fun……having two months free sounds almost like heaven. We will need air conditioning by next summer, no way can I spend everyday in a hot house. 🙂

I was reading the Journalism textbook today (I was finally able to go get the journalism stuff on Friday), and almost started laughing when I read: “the audience also has to be divided among those who prefer to rent movies and watch “television” on their VCRs” Technology has changed a lot in eight years, this book was only published in 1998. I guess I was spoiled in college, since you have to buy the text books, they are always up-to-date…..I remember the first time I read a textbook and it had current information in it I was blown away, I guess I’m back in the stone age again. 😦

Okay, I just wanted to post a little. I need to get working so I can go home and workout: goal this week 30 mins every day. Today will be day one. I’m so bad at this.

Wasting away….

time that is. I hope this summer goes fast, but not too fast. All my people are out of the office this week, which is making the week really slow and it is only Tuesday. Of course, that could have something to do with the fact that I just got this really great job that I can’t stop thinking about.

Yesterday I went to Benefits Training, not all that exciting, but need-to-know information. I showed up a bit early (only 30 minutes) and I think they wanted to get rid of me. 🙂 J/K They sent me down the hall to get my ID picture taken. I suppose the photo isn’t completely terrible but I really wasn’t prepared to have my photo taken and to make it just a tad worse, it is good for two full years…..ahhh. I have another class on Thursday: Child Abuse and Bloodborne Disease…..sounds like fun.

Yesterday afternoon I got a call from Corrie, those who read my last blog will remember her as one of the teachers that interviewed me, she wanted to know if I wanted to come by this week of next and meet the staff, see my classroom and pick up some books. Do I? Yes, Of Course, Today, Perfect. Well, that’s what I wish I would have said, but since I had that training to go to I couldn’t and this week is pretty busy, so my real response was: “Sounds like fun. What time next week is good for you?” Good thing she picked Monday, I couldn’t have gone two weeks, one day has practically killed me. 🙂 So excited!!!!!!

So this weekend is going to be interesting……I feel like I’m spending the whole weekend with my Dad’s side of the family and we rarely see them, even though most of them live within an hour drive. Oops. Anyway, my Aunt is getting married on Friday night at 6 at her house. This will be her third marriage, (I was the flower girl in the last wedding) and I really hope this one works out for her. Funny thing…..she has a son named Nick and he has a son named Nick and I think they are like a year or two apart……won’t that be confusing.

Then on Sunday, back to my aunt’s house for my grandpa’s 90th Birthday Celebration. Oh how I wish I had all his stories on video, he has some great stories of growing up rich, then becoming an orphan, joining the army and marrying my grandma, raising four children and graduating high school at age 50 or 53. I will definitely bring the video camera on Sunday, hopefully I’ll get some good memory stuff.

Zach wants to make some peanut brittle to give Grandpa. For those who don’t know, Grandpa makes the BEST peanut brittle on the face of the earth and he taught us how to make it at Thanksgiving. He wanted to ensure that the recipe gets passed along before he dies, so all the relatives that visit, he teaches them how to make it, in hopes that someone will be able to perfect it like he has. Our first batch was pitiful:
Jenn: “Umm, guys, the pan is smoking.”
Stacy: “No, isn’t not smoking, it’s just steam. It’s really hot.”
Zach, inspecting closely: “Yeah, it’s just steam.”
Jenn, from the table: “Sure, whatever you say.”
Minute later, smoke was everywhere and the batch of peanut brittle was outside in an attempt to keep the house from becoming to stinky. I got involved with the next batch and from then on we improved, little by little, I don’t think we’ve mastered it, but we are getting close and I think Zach wants to share that with Grandpa. We will see if it happens.

This blog ended up a lot longer than I was expecting. I really just started it to tell everyone that I get to see my classroom on Monday……looks like I got a little distracted. 🙂