I was looking though some old photos today. I’ve also been going back and retyping emails from my past. The combo of the two has me thinking about my life. I have been lucky to live a blessed life. Some of those blessing have been disguised and only upon later reflection do I realize how wonderful they were.
A brief recap of life since high school:
- I stayed at home and when to a commuter school for college. Originally this was only going to be for the first two years and then I was going to transfer. Life happened. I applied to the private school out of state that I wanted to transfer to and was accepted for the second time. Between getting accepted and accepting the offer, my dad had emergency surgery and was paralyzed from the waist down for several months. He slowly recovered, and although he has never made it back to 100%, he can walk and rarely do people realize what has happened to him. But I’m getting side tracked. I couldn’t leave my mom to take care of my dad and my little sister, a high schooler at the time. So, I never accepted the transfer offer. Blessings: I continued my relationship with Zach. I was in less debt when I graduated than I ever could have been had I transferred. I got an amazing job that paid well and worked around every scheduling conflict I ever had.
- In high school I never had a boyfriend. My first “boyfriend” was more a best friend in late middle school, early high school, but after that no one. Okay, I shouldn’t say no one. I did go on at least one date, but we both didn’t think it had the potential to move beyond that. I’m still pondering why I was such a loser, but that is of no consequence now. My first year of college I went through every guy that would become part of my history: Jeremy-good friend, something more? He lived out of state and we couldn’t figure it out….on to Nathan. That one was short lived….a few months. Nathan is a nice guy, I still talk to him from time to time, but all he cared about was money and my lip biting and the fact that I love God (even though he claimed to be a Christian) got in the way and our relationship ended. Jeremy jumped back into my life. Jeremy and I were great friends. We knew each other very well, but as the time grew closer for him to move down here, the more I got interested in this new guy, Russ. Since Jeremy and I were “just friends,” I never thought much of the fact of him moving down here, but then he got here and started freaking me out. I remember him saying things that made it sound like we were going to get married and he’d only been here a week. That just pushed me closer to Russ, but that was a blessing. Russ was the player of all the guys I was ever “with.” He only wanted to break me. Make me kiss him, but he never succeeded. After two weeks of trying, he somewhat gave up and told me we could only ever be friends because I reminded him too much of his mom. But that wouldn’t stop him from asking me to make out with him when no one was around. Russ did enlighten me to the ways of the world. I learned more in our two weeks, than in my nineteen years to that point. And I was no longer a holding hands virgin. But I was crushed….I cried for hours, I was miserable. Blessing: Had this not happen, I wouldn’t have gone back to the daycare center. I wouldn’t have met Zach for the second time. I wouldn’t have given him a chance. I would have been scared away by his life.
- When Zach and I got married we lived for a year and a half in a two-bedroom apartment with my father-in-law. It seems like it would be an awkward situation and I suppose in someways it was. I do remember feeling like we’d just gotten married and grown up when we moved into our house. And I do love walking around naked, and that’s not quite the way you should do things when you live with your father-in-law, but looking back it was a huge blessing. Ron is one of the most easy going people I have ever known, but he is shy and keeps to himself. I do not think I would have the great relationship I have with him, had we not lived together. There are just things you learn only by living. We got to spend more time with Zach’s brother. We ate together. He helped take care of the dog and would take her on long, long walks. He paid half the rent, even though there were three of us. Blessing: I was able to finish school and student teach for far less money than had we had to pay for everything on our own. We were then able to move into a house as our first place together instead of an apartment. Another blessing: During that year Ron had a few mishaps. I won’t go into details, but several times I received calls from the ER. One time, Ron had to have jaw surgery and was in ICU for a few days and then had to eat with a straw for six weeks. I know the was a rough time for Ron and I hope he was blessed with us living with him and he could rely on us for odds and ends. I know I was thankful to have him around when I broke my foot a few months later.
Essentially, I started this blog to write about Ron. I know he reads this blog from time to time, so….
Ron – I’m glad you are in my life. I’m glad you put up with Zach and I, especially me and my pushyness. Most people complain about there in-laws, and would dread having to live with them. But I look back on those times as happy memories and would do it again in a heartbeat. My words can’t express my thoughts well enough, but I have this feeling you will completely understand. I love you…..Jenn